Untitled 

This seems to be the one place I can say exactly what’s going on and not get judged or cause an argument or upset anyone. So I thought I get out what’s going on. 

I’ve just spent the last 15 minutes picking out fluff from my jumper that had stuck and dried to the cuts I made on my stomach last night. They all started oozing and stuck to my top. I often think about giving myself liposuction. Just cutting off my whole stomach. I hate how wobbly and big it’s got. It over hangs all my jeans and tights. It’s disgusting. I’ve ordered three W new dresses online and I’m worried that there all going to look awful. There all figure hugging and I don’t have the figure anymore to wear figure hugging clothes. I’m so ashamed of my figure. It’s awful. It’s ugly. It’s hideous. I’ve really let myself go. 

Today I skipped lunch at work but then I got hungry so I ate a slice of cake that couldn’t be sold as it had got squashed. So I ate it. Right fatty. I need to restrict. I need to loose Weight. But I just can’t seem to. I have no self control. 

And on top of all of this I’m signed off work sick but I’m going im. I have family issues too and now someone very close to me is annoyed that I said I  jealous of people still in hospital. 

I can’t seem to do anything right so I may as just well stop and give up. 

3 thoughts on “Untitled 

  1. I’ll fight you for the dropped cake. Seriously though, I’m going to have to start running after Christmas. I used to go running a couple of times a week. I’m thinking if I run, I can still eat cake and get away with it.

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  2. I love your posts! I have never come across someone who is going through exactly what I am battling with at the moment and at exactly the same time! Hard as it is for you right now, I hope there is some comfort in the support & hope you are unintentionally offering me. You can articulate and document the raw feelings and distress I am experiencing too in a way I can’t – you speak for us both!
    The only difference being our age, I’m more than old enough to be your mother!!

    Keep at it, you’ll win this!!! Jennyx

    Like

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