I’m a fat ugly greedy ****. I really am. It’s not even 9am and I’ve already eaten two bits of homemade fudge. I then tried to make myself sick. But I can’t. Why can’t I. Why!! It’s not fair. I want to. I really do. I need to. I need to learn how to make myself sick. I have to. Today’s been a disaster already. I reached for the razor already. And that was without washing. I just ran to the bathroom picked it up and sliced my arms to shred. They now sting and are covered in blood. So now I can’t get my arms out. I’ll have to hide them. I’m meant to be dating etc. But who would want to date me. They’ll see my arms and run. I’m so messed up. I really am. I need something to change. I’m just thinking of jumping. Of ending it all.