Stress

I’m so damn stressed. Like all of the time. My mind is so stable thinking of something and it doesn’t stop till it’s done. Then it thinks about something else. I’m convinced I’m fat. I feel fat. I look fat. I am fat. Yet I’m hungry. I hate my body image it’s horrible. As well as recovering from anorexia I now have no job, no money, no friends. I’m bringing nothing to life and I’m so miserable and fed up with mine. Yes I love my family and partner but I genuinely believe they’d be better off without me. I can’t cope with all this stress. It’s turning me to drink. Drink is the only thing that makes me feel better. It shouldn’t be like this. My partner is getting annoyed at me and I don’t blame him. I’m a nightmare I really am. Life shouldn’t be this hard it shouldn’t be this much of a struggle. I should be able to relax. To switch off but I can’t. I’m physically and mentally exhausted but can’t sleep. I can literally hear my brian ticking over. It hurts. It’s hard. I just want a crystal ball and to see if this battle now is worth it. I don’t no how I get up each day. I really have had enough right now