Meal out 

Im a fat fucker. Yep that’s me. A fat, greedy pig. Today for lunch we had to eat out. Apparently it’s a normal thing and they want us to be normal so I had to go with it. I wasn’t allowed to opt out. The chosen place was weatherspoons. Which has calories next to literally everything including drinks. I studied the menu for ages before we left, scrutinised over everything, mmming and ahhhing over all the choices. Calculating in my head what would sit better. I already knew I wouldn’t go for what I wanted I would go with the one with the least calories In it. Though I had to stick to a certain range so couldn’t just go for salad. I chose veggie sausage and mash. Next to it it said 702 in little numbers. 702 calories. So much! So greedy! Such a pig! I ordered it. Which was a task in itself but then the next challenge came and I had to eat it. I was expecting 2 sausages and some mash and peas. Instead I got 3 sausages, a bowl full of mash potato covered in peas and gravy. I’m convinced that 3 veggie sausages is more than 702 calories. What if I got it wrong and it was 1702. I’m already planning tomorrow. I’m off from day patient so I’m not going to eat anything but 4 marshmallows. A skinny cap. And a bowl of soup. I’ll hit 500. If I’m lucky. Where as today I hit 702 in one meal 😦 I can’t explain how I feel other than fat. Greedy. Disgusting. Bloated. Repulsive. Ugly. 

One thought on “Meal out 

  1. I completely relate to this. I hate the fact menus have calories next to them, it always sets me off in a panic and I start to try calculate what is ‘best’ to have and what ‘can I do tomorrow or later to offset it’. I always found myself checking menus online if I knew where we were going and making ‘rules’ and then panicking or feeling the need to ‘punish’ myself if I broke these rules.

    I miss the days where I could go out and just enjoy the social side and experience being with my friends without all these thoughts. You’re not alone though xx

    Liked by 1 person

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