Ahhhhh I have so many emotions. So many feelings. So much going on and all I want to do is contact someone I can’t. Something happened today and I had no one to tell. No one would care or even understand the funny side of it. So instead I resorted to blogging how I feel. 

I can’t explain how I feel. I’m sick of life or “life” as it should be. It’s not life. This is just torture. Like living in a bubble. Everything passing you by. 

I don’t know whats going on. I’ve only been back 2 hours and  feel so  down already. I just have this overwhelming feeling of lonliness. I’m sick of standing by and watching people live there lives. Partying. Going out. Doing x y and z and I’m stuck in hospital. I’m sick of seeing people I know getting on with there lives and I’m in here just watching it all pass by. 

I want to just end all of this. I’m stuck alive not living. It’s like a nightmare and I’m waiting to wake up but I can’t. I’m stuck. Stuck forever. My life is over so want can’t I just cease to be alive and it can all be over for good 

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